Sunday, June 26, 2005

Barefoot and Pregnant

Holy redneck philosophies, Batman, but when the shoe fits,oh, I guess that saying doesn't apply when one is barefoot. Regardless, tonight we were visited by my in-laws. I have to say that I have been blessed with fantastic in-laws even though we border on a Barone visitation schedule but that has to be expected during a first pregnancy. This is our third consecutive weekend with them and while I enjoy the thought of sitting around while everything gets done around me, the truth of the matter is that I work my ass off when we visit them or are visited by them.

Today we looked at new houses for our new family. Planning for a child is fun and at each location I was able to imagine a baby room here or a play pen there, here a toy, there some joy everywhere a boy boy. Old McShtuey has a child E-I-E-I-O!!! (Boy rhymed in the last verse, don't be confused). I can't wait to take possession and start decorating a baby room.

I have big plans too. I want to use an overhead projector to shine images onto the wall, which I will then trace and fill in with paint. Or, a traditional wainscoting in white with a nice baby blue sky with fluffy white clouds on the ceiling. Or a jungle theme, with tall blades of grass and funny animals sticking there heads out to say hello to Cletus. I know though that none of this will happen. My plans are not too grand, or too elaborate. The problem is that I do not have an artistic bone in my body. My imagination runs wild with ideas but my brain does not have the skills to tell my hands how to do it.

Anyway, after a nice dinner with the in-laws we walked them out to the car for the drive home. It was then that my wife realized that she had forgotten her shoes inside. She was barefoot...And pregnant. And I didn't feel any more masculine than I did before she was barefoot and pregnant. I didn't take any extra comfort in the knowledge handed down from redneck to redneck for decades that she was less likely to cheat because she didn't have shoes to go out and she was 'undesirable' in her condition. In fact, the opposite was true. She was outside without shoes, proving to the world that a lack of shoes alone will not keep her in the house. Also, everyday she grows more beautiful and more desirable. Barefoot and pregnant is just the most recent cliches my wife has bashed her way through.

Nothing about Cletus today. Today is just about my barefoot and pregnant wife.

I love you Poops!!!


Blogger Mupiel said...

My wife is most beautiful when she is being a mother. Pregnancy is one thing but motherhood is much more impressive.

3:36 p.m.  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I sincerely hope that your 'Cletus' brings the joy to your lives that my 'Cletus' has brought to me for 331/2 years!!!

Continue to get pleasure from everyday of your pregnancy - I know that you will be wonderful parents and that 'Cletus' has been blessed to have been given to you both.

11:07 p.m.  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Were you petrified when you found out you were going to be a Dad? My boyfriend seems to bequestions everything, our entire relationship since we found out we were pregnant at the weekend is this normal, please help.

5:33 a.m.  
Blogger TheFertalizer said...

We plaaned our pregnancy so I did not suffer the shock of the information. Pregnancy is huge and some people need time to absorb the news. I think it is only natural to be frightened by it. It is easier to question your surroundings, though, then it is to question yourself. What I mean is that your boyfriend may be worried about whether he will be a good father but is questioning everything else. Not that you don't already have enough to think about, but try to let him know that you think he will be a wonderful dad. Help him picture being the protective father of a daughter or the best friend to a young son. Do this and I am sure that before you see the ultrasound there will be no doubts left.

7:01 a.m.  

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