Basic Medical Advice - Tylenol and Metamucil

I am not talking about serious medical conditions here today. I am talking about mundane everyday type problems. Where do you get advice for these things? Today my wife had a headache, it wouldn't go away. After a few hours of pounding pain a certain level of mental insanity sets in and you become someone other than yourself. It is like Chinese water torture without the water. It was finally time to take some medication, the first medication.

You see, even though my wife had a great deal of morning sickness and was assured that Dyclectin was safe (remind me to check the spelling) my wife decided to grin and bear it so Cletus the fetus could remain drug free...just in case. This should be the irony of ironies story. Anyway, how do you medicate something like a headache? Where do you go for info about which pain reliever is safest? The internet was a waste of time as it had way to much info. The pharmacy was closed. The sales clerk at Thyme Maternity mentioned Tylenol but her opinion carried very little weight as she probably specialized in fashion in College, deciding to skip medical school to join the workforce. She was right, by the way. Tylenol is safe for pregnant ladies. I had it verified by Tele-health Ontario.

I also learned another piece if info from the nurse at Tele-Health Ontario. For some reason, out of the blue, the nurse blurted out that should my wife ever become constipated Metamucil is the recommended product. I asked her how my wife's headache remedy request was a precursor to a discussion about her bowel movements but I never got an answer.

Tele-Health Ontario. Giving you the advice you need - and then some.
-this message brought to you by the makers of Metamucil - producers of fine stool softeners for over 50 years. Metamucil, it keeps America running.

Oh Irony of Ironies

What a waste of a good title for a half relevant story but I couldn't resist. I just like the expression.

I promised that I would describe our new place today. First though I must explain why we need a new place. We live downtown in a renovated loft space above a store. It is a single 1200 square foot room with lots of windows, fifteen foot ceilings and hardwood throughout. We love it. The problem is that when we have guests they must sleep on our couches which are technically in our bedroom. Cuddling becomes holding hands under the blankets and even then I feel like I am throwing caution to the wind. A dirty little man drawing on the palm of my wife's hand.

Throw in a new baby (that is a figure of speech as you should never throw in your new baby) and this place, as large as it is, will seem crowded. We needed walls. We needed stairs. Most importantly we needed a washer and dryer as we are looking towards cloth diapers. Doing laundry once a week while your baby is filling a few diapers with poop every day is not cool.

So we went looking for a baby friendly place with a room to decorate, stairs, walls and a washer and dryer. The first place we found was perfect. They even know that we have a monster of a dog. It had everything we were looking for. Two bedrooms on the second floor, main floor laundry, hardwood flooring etc. It even has a dishwasher and for those cold romantic winter nights with my very pregnant wife, or wife and baby, a working fireplace.

So where is the irony of ironies you ask. Well I'll tell you half of the ironies now. We are living next door to a hospital which could have delivered our child only two weeks ago. Back in the middle of June the hospital closed its doors for the last time and we now have to travel across town when we go into labour. The second half of the ironies is how we will be traveling.

Four months ago, before we became pregnant, we put in an order for a new car. We thought it would be fun before the inevitable minivan and with a one year lease we were sure to have it traded in long before worrying about baby seats. After a longer than expected wait for the car to be produced and then shipped across the ocean, we will finally be receiving our new car tomorrow. A brand new 2006 Mini Cooper. With the monster dog and baby seat I may be able to fit into it as well.

Is that enough irony for you???

Good night

A First Appointment Missed

Some appointments will be missed. This is unavoidable. I work for the she-devil. No, the truth is that my boss is one-hundred percent behind me regarding my desire to get to as many appointments as possible and she has been wonderful in that regard. That being said, I am not going to take advantage of her generosity and there will be some appointments I will not get too. Today is one of those days and I missed hearing the sound of Cletus's heart beat.

My wife met with the mid-wife today. We were not sure about this option because everyone who has ever had a baby, and most of those who haven't, have an opinion about mid-wives and they have all shared their stories with us. We have heard stories on both sides of the argument (mostly good) but we wanted to make the decision with our own research. Well it seems that mid-wives are now the assistance of choice for my wife so I will be going to our next appointment with her to meet our new caregiver. By the way, this is the same lady who recommended the cattle trough to our friends earlier in the blog. I think the deciding factor is just an understanding that we want to 'experience' this pregnancy and by taking a little extra time to understand everything with a mid-wife we hope to have a fuller, richer experience.

The saddest, and happiest, part of the day for me was hearing that my wife was able to hear Cletus's heart beat. I missed my chance today but there will be other opportunities. I guess my point is that while I want to be there for every appointment reality says that I should pick my times off carefully. I would hate to not get time off and miss an ultrasound because I attended every bloodwork and routine check-up that my wife had to go to. My employer has been fair with me and I will be fair in return.

Tomorrow I will tell you all about the new place we rented for our growing family.

Fun, fun, fun.

Dad

Barefoot and Pregnant

Holy redneck philosophies, Batman, but when the shoe fits,oh, I guess that saying doesn't apply when one is barefoot. Regardless, tonight we were visited by my in-laws. I have to say that I have been blessed with fantastic in-laws even though we border on a Barone visitation schedule but that has to be expected during a first pregnancy. This is our third consecutive weekend with them and while I enjoy the thought of sitting around while everything gets done around me, the truth of the matter is that I work my ass off when we visit them or are visited by them.

Today we looked at new houses for our new family. Planning for a child is fun and at each location I was able to imagine a baby room here or a play pen there, here a toy, there some joy everywhere a boy boy. Old McShtuey has a child E-I-E-I-O!!! (Boy rhymed in the last verse, don't be confused). I can't wait to take possession and start decorating a baby room.

I have big plans too. I want to use an overhead projector to shine images onto the wall, which I will then trace and fill in with paint. Or, a traditional wainscoting in white with a nice baby blue sky with fluffy white clouds on the ceiling. Or a jungle theme, with tall blades of grass and funny animals sticking there heads out to say hello to Cletus. I know though that none of this will happen. My plans are not too grand, or too elaborate. The problem is that I do not have an artistic bone in my body. My imagination runs wild with ideas but my brain does not have the skills to tell my hands how to do it.

Anyway, after a nice dinner with the in-laws we walked them out to the car for the drive home. It was then that my wife realized that she had forgotten her shoes inside. She was barefoot...And pregnant. And I didn't feel any more masculine than I did before she was barefoot and pregnant. I didn't take any extra comfort in the knowledge handed down from redneck to redneck for decades that she was less likely to cheat because she didn't have shoes to go out and she was 'undesirable' in her condition. In fact, the opposite was true. She was outside without shoes, proving to the world that a lack of shoes alone will not keep her in the house. Also, everyday she grows more beautiful and more desirable. Barefoot and pregnant is just the most recent cliches my wife has bashed her way through.

Nothing about Cletus today. Today is just about my barefoot and pregnant wife.

I love you Poops!!!

Dinner With Friends With A Baby

Well I have received comments to my posts by two people. One of the comments was posted by a friend at work, who has a young son and the other was posted by our VERY BEST FRIENDS in London (that was for you S so you can sleep better). What is particularly special about these friends is that they have a really cool new addition to their family, a son named Alexander who is around 40 days old today.

One of the things that people may find interesting about S&R is that they chose to give birth at home. What I found most interesting was what they gave birth in and who was there. It all started on their honeymoon and 8 months later S asked my wife if she would like to be there at the birth of their son. What they did not know at the time was that we had just found out that we were having a baby and wanted to keep it a secret for a little while. My greatest concern was that labour and delivery would be too much for my newly impregnated wife to watch.

When the phone rang at 7:00 am on her due date I just crossed my fingers and hoped for the best. I walked my wife over to their house to congratulate R on the big day. S was upstairs, obviously in labour, sitting in a full sized cattle trough with a home made water heating system attached to the side. I suppose that when the midwife suggested renting a birthing pool she mentioned that you could also purchase a giant metal cattle trough, slug it in from the farmers supply store, haul it up the stairs and fill it with 900L of water which needed to be heated to just the right temperature.

So there, in the baby's room, on her due date and after only 3 really big pushes, S gave birth to Alex. It was such a positive experience for my wife that she is meeting the same midwife on Tuesday to discuss midwivery and birthing options.

Nothing funny tonight I'm afraid.

Good night Cletus. Good night Alex

Is it possible???

Tonight my wife thought she felt a flutter in her belly and joked that it might be our child but after doing some reading on the internet tonight we think it might have been possible. We are just shy of 14 weeks and we now feel that we (or more specifically she) may have felt the baby move for the first time.

Think about this. If we as parents do our jobs right and our child grows up healthy and enjoys a long and healthy life, that heart we saw beating last week will continue to do so for a hundred years. Hopefully for a long time after my heart has ceased to beat. Life is a trip.

I need sleep while I can get it.

Good night Cletus

I read a whole book tonight...

My wife loves garage sales. Last year there was only one reason that I was allowed to drive by without stopping and that was if the garage sale was obviously just children's stuff. Now those seem to be the most desirable. I am not sure why though. I am all for buying used, recycling if you will, but name one item that our newborn will need that we won't prefer to buy new. Last weekend we came across a practical item. It was priced right. We would have saved money. It was in 'as new' condition. It was a breast pump!!! I refuse to buy 'as new' underwear, especially if they were designed to pump fluids from my privates. Why would we want a used breast pump?

Anyway, I bought a book, A Guy's Guide To Pregnancy, and read it from cover to cover tonight while sitting at Williams Coffee Pub. Most of the information was helpful, if not a little obvious. What surprised me though was how some of the topics had me crying into my coffee. When the book suggested that I share the late night feedings by bottling breastmilk (we are going to get a new pump) and letting my wife sleep I pictured sitting with our little Cletus in a rocking chair or on the floor under a window with fresh snow on the ground and a big moon out the window. When it talked about what will happen in the delivery room I pictured taking our child and sitting on the ground with Cletus between my crossed legs and leaning over as far as I could while using my arms as a big shield to ward of the world, the bright lights and the sterile hospital environment, looking straight down into our new child's face, tears dripping on the newest of new skin.

I am aware that I have a good imagination. I am also aware that I cry easily. Before I even saw my wife come into the church (all I could see was the top of her veil) I was in tears and I cried through the whole ceremony. I am not ashamed of my tears and I don't try to hide them. But holy crap, I'm going to need a camel back to get through delivery day. I'll be stealing ice-chips from my wife to fight off dehydration.

What a Display!!! Was it a Mistake???

I was just sitting down to post my message when a series of loud explosions rocked our house. Looking out the window I saw a fantastic fireworks display down on the Thames. Now London has a great display every year, however, we are still over a week away from Canada Day and there is no reason why such a show would have happened today. I am guessing either a rather large mistake occurred or some troubled youth (probably Adam T.) snuck onto the barge and decided to set them off. If that was the fireworks destined for Canada Day celebrations then I want to ensure Londoners that it was, or would have been, a fantastic show indeed.

Back to our pregnancy. We went maternity cloths shopping again today. Briefly, Old Navy has some half decent prices on selected items but the quality did not do it for me. Some outfits were nice and we did pick up a pair of pants and a top ($70 for the outfit) but most of the cloths were designed to cover the body, not to fit the body and my wife's body is looking better and better everyday. I want to see, and celebrate, her pregnancy, not cover it up.

We then went next door to Motherhood Maternity. What a find. Great prices. Nice fashions. Accessories like pre-natal Yoga videos and Doppler devices. This place was great. We even found another couple there that were due around the same time as we are. If you happen to read this then WE WANT TO BE YOUR FRIENDS!!! My wife and I had a good laugh about going back into the store and asking them to take us home with them. It is nice to have friends that are pregnant or have just given birth but these are the first people we have met that are due when we are. They too were shopping for their first cloths. Anyway, we don't really want to be your friends. I don't want to seem desperate or anything. I don't want to be friends with the first couple that comes along. I will need to give this decision more thought.

Last but not least, I took the name Cletus the Fetus for a test drive around the office today along with a picture of our ultrasound. Apparently the name Cletus reminds some people of a part of the female reproductive system. Apparently I don't care. I love the name and until he/she is actually born the name Cletus the Fetus will stand.

All for now.

Dad

Shopping for Maternity Clothes

That little band of elastic is expensive.

We went shopping for a couple outfits today at Thyme Maternity at the Galleria Mall and the racks always looked like such fun. Discounts galore. Every rack had pricing $9.99 or $19.99 etc. Now admittedly I am probably the typical male shopper but the whole 'and up' phrase never really meant very much to me until today. I didn't realize that 'and up' could mean by multiples of the original price. After settling on a pair of pants and a nice new top (at least 6 times the pre-'and up' price) I realized that I played it right. After sacrificing her uterus to our joint creation the last thing you should mention is the price tag on the new clothes needed to cover said pregnancy. I can't even imagine the 'and up' cost of a new, never before used uterus. And this particular uterus comes with all the extras. For example, the uterus I've decided to impregnate comes with dual matching Fallopian tubes, the state of the art cervix safety system and a 9 month extended warranty. This model is priceless. It is like shopping for a Lamborghini. If you have to ask the price, you can't afford it.

We then took a stroll to the library to look up some baby names. For the record, any names under serious consideration will not be mentioned here. I have a couple that I am quite fond of and I found a couple, well, not so much. Cornelius, for example, does a fine job as a name in Harry Potter but as soon as you leave the grounds at Hogwarts you may find it a difficult name to have. Chichi (for a male) is just funny. And nobody in there right mind would name their child Engelbert. Then again, there is a Dweezle Zappa.

My beautiful wife needs some milk and fruit so I shall be off to feed her.

Good night

P.S. I have dubbed the fetus, Cletus. Until a more appropriate name has been decided, and the sex has been determined, I may be inclined to just refer to the Fetus as Cletus.

LONG LIVE CLETUS THE FETUS!!!

So much to remember

Sunday June 19th, 2005

I want to remember everything about this pregnancy. I want to write it all down, take pictures, join groups, learn baby signs and today I wanted to do a belly mould of my wife. Considering that we have just completed the first tri-mester she took it very well.

That's something else I need to remember. The changes in my life are profound but they don't even come close to what she is going through. I'm talking about the combined effect of hormone's, a women intuition and woman's logic. This combination leads to discussions at 3 o'clock every morning. At first I try to not let go of the pleasant dream I was enjoying but then I realize who is talking to me and why. This is the most important thing for me to remember now. Her concerns are real. The least I can do is try to listen. The fact that I am up at three o'clock is just good training for when I become a Dad.

I want to quickly explain a few things about this blog and about me. I love me wife more than she will ever know. Everyday I smile or laugh when she does something. Sometimes she thinks that I am laughing at her expense, but the truth is that I can't contain my emotions when I watch her and my comments or facial expressions are misunderstood. It happens. At the same time, I have a comedic view on life experiences. I see humor where others may not. It is not my intention to laugh "AT" my wife or family members but to share with you the experiences that bring joy to my life everyday.

I hope a little reality is okay with you.

First Time Blogger, First Time Father

FRIDAY JUNE 17th, 2005.

I have decided that I want to share everything that I experience with this pregnancy with all of you. I am not sure why. I don't even get this whole Blog thing. How do you even stumble upon this stuff. It doesn't really matter if you do or not, I just want to say I did something. My wife is doing everything else. She carries the fetus, she gets the morning sickness, she gains the weight and she has her life interrupted while I go about my business in relative comfort. So I will make a commitment to share with you, through this site, our thoughts and updates and I will try to give a rather male tilt to the whole affair.

Right now we are at week 13. The first trimester is completed and we are looking good. Our little fetus now has fingernails and fingerprints. Heck, it (he/she) has fingers. This may not seem like much to you but the last time I checked this kid out it was a sperm and now look at it.

I guess one thing I should mention is that we don't know the sex of our baby yet. We haven't decided if we want to know. For the purpose of this blog I will just randomly assign sex until we know for sure.

One thing I do know is how excited I am. Just this morning I rolled over and said good morning to our fetus and said "I Love You Baby" for the first time. Kind of weird talking to your wife's belly-button but I couldn't help it.
WE ARE HAVING A BABY!!!